Post by darkangel on Mar 23, 2008 15:36:45 GMT -5
Not being a member of team DVS is extremely frustrating. I feel left out, and not just in terms of conversations… an issue to be later addressed. But as much as I am not a member of team DVS, I’m still a RIP… I still like to consider myself a part of the friendship. And I can see very well when “team” matters affect relationships, and vice versa.
I cannot paintball. I wish I could, but I don’t. My not being a member causes my opinion to be suppressed greatly. As rude as it feels, I understand. I realize that non-team members should not have an opinion on DVS affairs, nor should they influence the opinion of other members on the team, because we cannot ever know the entirety of the situation. This is kind of ironic, because this is only on the occasion of team meetings, as I’m sure that every team DVS member goes home to their girlfriend and tells them what happens, and the girlfriend shares their opinion… so there will be influence regardless. I also understand that at team meetings, it is important to receive first and foremost the opinion of the members, because matters affect them directly, and no one else. To have others share their opinion would plague meetings with unnecessary talking… even though no one can deny that topics do trail to irrelevant conversations/jokes.
I enjoy listening in on conversations, and being a part of meetings. No one likes being left in the dark… it’s very frustrating. Wanting to keep that minimum involvement, I keep quiet. I let you suppress me, because I know that if I don’t appease you, I will never be allowed to another meeting.
With that said, there is only so much a person can take of seeing friends make decisions without considering so much. I hold my tongue at meetings… because there is a lot you want to discuss, I know, I’ve addressed this…. This is why I am stating all this now. I let you say your piece where it mattered… in a corner of Timmy’s. I believe in functionalism, I believe in women having a “place”. But here, at least I can have my say without a man telling me what that place is.
There is a lot of testosterone raging on this team. A female member can be a great asset to give incite on issues that your male ways will not let you see. With that said, it depends who the female is. DVS is a group of friends. A female friend that can paintball—wicked. A female that is in a relationship, used to be a in a relationship, or may get into a relationship with a DVS member has a very very big possibility of biting everyone in the ass. Relationships are tricky things, and they are not guaranteed permanence. As soon as something goes awry with the relationship, the team will suffer. A temporary stand-in may be great when there is a player missing at the moment, etc. However, when considering long-term membership, I strongly advise to think of the future of the team. You put too much into the team to overlook something that is so obvious.
Moving on: I am all for having a team leader. I think the team leader should have experience with paintball so they can execute game plans effectively, as well as give moral support for the team. I think Ryan fits this fine. He has the experience, and people generally listen. My issue is with co-captains. I don’t see the point in co-captains. It seems that all your co-captains are doing are being translators for the captain… putting into words what the captain cannot say, when in reality, the captain speaks for himself just fine. All having “co-captains” does, is give two extra people UNDESERVED authority to speak over everyone else. At meetings you have a system of letting everyone have their turn in speaking. “Co-captains” included. Aside from the captain, the power to speak should end there, or be shared. You want to create a good team. What you are doing is creating teamsssss (plural!). Half your team is apparently above the other half. You don’t have a single, functional, team anymore. You have a team *within* a team. Ryan deserved his position in being captain. He founded the team, it was his idea, he is the most loyal, he wants this to work the most, and he is the one with the experience. The co-captains have supported the captain… but does that REALLY constitute enough reason to give them unnecessary power over everyone else? It’s just being a good friend, really. Something anyone can do. This inequality in simply just the TITLES being given truly defeats the morale of the team. You guys are treating your team like a club… only certain people can talk, only certain people can listen, only certain people can enter when they give the right password and secret handshake. You are creating a pyramid hierarchy with people at the top, and people at the bottom. What are you going to do when the people at the bottom can’t take it anymore? Your pyramid will collapse.
I know you want to take this team seriously, as you should. But aren’t games supposed to be fun, too? When you guys are frustrated and tired of each other, it doesn’t look like you are having very much fun at all. If this is consistent, this team is going to seem more like a burden then anything else.
What I also see a lot of is underhanded “team”-related jokes where there shouldn’t be. As I had said before, DVS is a team consisting of people that have already been friends for a while. However, the pyramid hierarchy that is apparent on the team, is becoming evident when you guys are just hanging out as “friends”. The people who are superior on the team, still create an inferiority amongst the “bottom players” when you aren’t even on the field anymore. When this happens when you guys are hanging out, it creates negative feelings, and then of course this is going to be brought back and reflected on the field. Your friendships are being affected, and then “the team that started as friends” will become “the team that used to be friends”.
I’m proud at how far you guys have come. Please don’t let small mistakes put the team in jeopardy.
I cannot paintball. I wish I could, but I don’t. My not being a member causes my opinion to be suppressed greatly. As rude as it feels, I understand. I realize that non-team members should not have an opinion on DVS affairs, nor should they influence the opinion of other members on the team, because we cannot ever know the entirety of the situation. This is kind of ironic, because this is only on the occasion of team meetings, as I’m sure that every team DVS member goes home to their girlfriend and tells them what happens, and the girlfriend shares their opinion… so there will be influence regardless. I also understand that at team meetings, it is important to receive first and foremost the opinion of the members, because matters affect them directly, and no one else. To have others share their opinion would plague meetings with unnecessary talking… even though no one can deny that topics do trail to irrelevant conversations/jokes.
I enjoy listening in on conversations, and being a part of meetings. No one likes being left in the dark… it’s very frustrating. Wanting to keep that minimum involvement, I keep quiet. I let you suppress me, because I know that if I don’t appease you, I will never be allowed to another meeting.
With that said, there is only so much a person can take of seeing friends make decisions without considering so much. I hold my tongue at meetings… because there is a lot you want to discuss, I know, I’ve addressed this…. This is why I am stating all this now. I let you say your piece where it mattered… in a corner of Timmy’s. I believe in functionalism, I believe in women having a “place”. But here, at least I can have my say without a man telling me what that place is.
There is a lot of testosterone raging on this team. A female member can be a great asset to give incite on issues that your male ways will not let you see. With that said, it depends who the female is. DVS is a group of friends. A female friend that can paintball—wicked. A female that is in a relationship, used to be a in a relationship, or may get into a relationship with a DVS member has a very very big possibility of biting everyone in the ass. Relationships are tricky things, and they are not guaranteed permanence. As soon as something goes awry with the relationship, the team will suffer. A temporary stand-in may be great when there is a player missing at the moment, etc. However, when considering long-term membership, I strongly advise to think of the future of the team. You put too much into the team to overlook something that is so obvious.
Moving on: I am all for having a team leader. I think the team leader should have experience with paintball so they can execute game plans effectively, as well as give moral support for the team. I think Ryan fits this fine. He has the experience, and people generally listen. My issue is with co-captains. I don’t see the point in co-captains. It seems that all your co-captains are doing are being translators for the captain… putting into words what the captain cannot say, when in reality, the captain speaks for himself just fine. All having “co-captains” does, is give two extra people UNDESERVED authority to speak over everyone else. At meetings you have a system of letting everyone have their turn in speaking. “Co-captains” included. Aside from the captain, the power to speak should end there, or be shared. You want to create a good team. What you are doing is creating teamsssss (plural!). Half your team is apparently above the other half. You don’t have a single, functional, team anymore. You have a team *within* a team. Ryan deserved his position in being captain. He founded the team, it was his idea, he is the most loyal, he wants this to work the most, and he is the one with the experience. The co-captains have supported the captain… but does that REALLY constitute enough reason to give them unnecessary power over everyone else? It’s just being a good friend, really. Something anyone can do. This inequality in simply just the TITLES being given truly defeats the morale of the team. You guys are treating your team like a club… only certain people can talk, only certain people can listen, only certain people can enter when they give the right password and secret handshake. You are creating a pyramid hierarchy with people at the top, and people at the bottom. What are you going to do when the people at the bottom can’t take it anymore? Your pyramid will collapse.
I know you want to take this team seriously, as you should. But aren’t games supposed to be fun, too? When you guys are frustrated and tired of each other, it doesn’t look like you are having very much fun at all. If this is consistent, this team is going to seem more like a burden then anything else.
What I also see a lot of is underhanded “team”-related jokes where there shouldn’t be. As I had said before, DVS is a team consisting of people that have already been friends for a while. However, the pyramid hierarchy that is apparent on the team, is becoming evident when you guys are just hanging out as “friends”. The people who are superior on the team, still create an inferiority amongst the “bottom players” when you aren’t even on the field anymore. When this happens when you guys are hanging out, it creates negative feelings, and then of course this is going to be brought back and reflected on the field. Your friendships are being affected, and then “the team that started as friends” will become “the team that used to be friends”.
I’m proud at how far you guys have come. Please don’t let small mistakes put the team in jeopardy.
